mgr/progress: compare up set instead of acting set

mgr/progress: compare up set instead of acting set

Problem:
The progress module failed to trigger when OSDs were reweighted
to 0. We were comparing old vs new acting sets after wrapping
them with set(), which discards ordering. As a result, a rotation
such as:

  old acting = [1,2,3,4]
  new acting = [2,3,4,1]

was reduced to the same unordered set {1,2,3,4}, and no change
was detected. Additionally, the acting set from OSDMap naturally
retains stale OSDs, so stale entries were not discarded.

Solution:
Compare the up set instead, which both preserves ordering and
drops stale OSDs. This ensures rotations and membership changes
are correctly detected. Also removed set() usage in
_osd_in_out() and tightened logging to reduce noise.

Fixes: https://tracker.ceph.com/issues/72647
Signed-off-by: Kamoltat Sirivadhna <ksirivad@redhat.com>